Would it be okay if we talked about urine for a little bit?
I took a drug test for my new job last week. In retrospect, I probably should have refrained from using the bathroom immediately before driving to the Quest Diagnostics office, which is located all of five minutes from my house. Upon arrival, I was handed a plastic cup and instructed to, "Give me all you got." Had this directive been in reference to the effort put forth during the urination process, as opposed to, say, the urine put forth during the urination process, I would have been in great shape.
It wasn't.
Long story short, I received a "QNS" on my first attempt, which apparently stands for Quantity Not Sufficient. I spent the next forty-five minutes pounding water in the waiting room, anxiously awaiting a full bladder and an opportunity to redeem myself.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Congrats on the new job!! YAY!
Also, nice choice on the title of the post.
"QNS" is better than the "inconclusive" I received on a recent test, let me assure you of that. (I later "passed" for those of you who may be concerned.)
I agree with Cogs: Awesome job on the blog post title.....and congrats on the new job.
At my place of employment, our annual physicals are always a topic of great discussion. One's 40th birthday brings with it the promise of an annual manual prostate exam by one of several doctors. One doc's got a nasty hook to his index finger; another is kind enough to remove her rings. Occasionally one of our guys comes up with a new an creative comment, along the lines of, "Hey, doc, let me know if you find my dignity in there."
Last year brought something I thought I'd never see. Our biggest guy, 6'7", 320lb, went for his physical with a "W" written on each butt cheek. Imagine the center of the area, and you have the word "WOW."
Now, I present a question for all of you, what's funnier: the fact that he thought of this, and actually went to a doctor in this state, OR, the fact that, to ensure its proper execution, another guy had to write it?
Post a Comment